The Jackson-Valdez Method
by Melovetacos
Summary: Leo and Percy's kick-the-crap-out-of-them guide to bullies!
1. Chapter 1

**The Jackson-Valdez Method **

**Just some ways that you can kick the crap outta bully, without getting suspended. No "Tell a teacher" crap, just straight up things to keep you alive. Alternating between Leo and Percy. **

1. The "You gotta catch me" method.

"Hey Valdez." Leo whirled around in search of the voice. "Oh hi Matt!" Matt Sloan was the school's head bully. Apparently he had left his last school due to an explosion, a guy names Percy something-or-other, Blah-blah-blah. Leo didn't listen to Matt explain, 'cause most times when Matt talked to him, it ended in Leo running for his life. Needless to say, Leo and Matt weren't friends. "I heard you burnt down your last school. Everyone 'round here thinks you use some sorta fire magic." C'mon Valdez, show me your magic. Or are you too stupid?" 'Hmmmm', Leo thought,'Fighting? Nah, he'd beat me up. Running?' A crazy plan came into Leo's mind. All he needed was his diversion. Leo eyes wandered, searching for something to help him. Leo and Matt were alone in an alleyway. Behind Leo was a wall too high to jump, and in front of it, an old,broken trampoline. To his right was a rusty red fire escape. To his left was a blank wall, nothing that could help him. And of course, in front of him was Matt Sloan, fat rich kid extraordinaire. "WHAT IS THAT!" Leo yelled pointing behind Matt, using his most oh-my-god-what-in-the-world-is-that-Help! voice. Matt, the idiot, turned around an said "Where?" By the time Matt had turned around, Leo was halfway up the fire escape. "VALDEZ!I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" Leo didn't even bother to turn around. "Can't kill me, if you can't catch me." Leo smirked, as he jumped of the fire escape. He landed full force on the trampoline, giving it one last use in life, and rocketed through the air, over the wall. Leo turned just as Matt jumped to the trampoline. Matt didn't bounce up. Apparently, Matt was too fat for the trampoline, and judging from the sound, Matt had broken another tooth in his ugly mouth.

Rule 1. Fighting won't do any good. Just run.


	2. PERCY CHAPTER

**2. The Jackson-Valdez method **

**Thank you guys for all the favorites, follows, and reviews. **

The "Having a seizure method"

Percy POV

Percy looked at the big, ugly face of his enemy. Nancy Bobofit. After she tripped Grover, Percy was understandably mad. He called her a couple of pretty bad names, and she and her "brothers" chased her into an empty storage room. Her brothers were basically 3 big triplet guys who liked to beat Percy to a pulp. The had formed the Avengers team of evil kids who wanted to kill Percy. "Come 'ere you ugly little runt." Said one on the guys. Percy couldn't keep them straight, because they had really stupid names; Marco, Polo, and Kyle.

Percy wanted to ask their parents what they had been thinking. Seriously, what kind of parent named their kid Kyle? (Just kidding) Suddenly, All 3 of them ran towards Percy. Percy having dealt with them before, knew fighting wouldn't get him out of this. So he did the natural thing. He collapsed to the floor and rolled around guys backed up, confused and a little scared. He rolled into a storage cabinet, which fell over, pinning the triplets to the floor. Nancy screamed an ran, yelling,"PERCY KILLED THEM! HE'S HAVING A SEIZURE!" Percy stood up, dusted off his clothes, ad walked back to his dorm.

Rule 2: They want to injure you, themselves scared when you aren't injured by them.


	3. ANNABETH CHAPTER

**3. The Jackson-Valdez method **

**I've decided that every 2 chapters I'll do a special chapter, featuring some of the PJO characters. This chapter is in Annabeth's POV**

**Annabeth **

The "take it and run" method

"Give it back now Drew!" Annabeth yelled, running into the bathroom. Drew had stolen Daedalus's laptop, to look at pictures of movie stars. Annabeth had tried to take it back, but Drew grabbed it an ran. Annabeth rushed into the bathroom to see Drew holding her laptop above a toilet. "Drew, give me the laptop. Now." Annabeth commanded, using her best I-will-kill-you-in-the-most-painful-way-I-can-thin k-of-and-watch-your-soul-burn-in-Tartus voice. "No! You won't even let me give you a makeover because you're on this stupid thing all day!" Drew shrieked. Annabeth resisted the urge to cringe and ask if she had strep throat. Drew brought the laptop closer to the surface of the water. "I'll let you give me a makeover if you give it back!" Annabeth pleaded. Drew perked up,"Really?!" Annabeth sighed," Of course...I WON'T!" Annabeth, taking advantage of Drew's confusion, yanked off one of Drew's 100 ft tall death trap shoes, and ran out the door. "Come back! The shoes were expensive, you know!" Drew yelled, hobbling out the door. Annabeth cringed while holding the shoes. They were at least 10 inches tall, bright pink, (A/N Spellcheck changed bright pink to priggish! Oh how I love spellcheck!) and covered in glitter. As soon as Drew came out the door, Annbeth snatched the laptop and ran all the way back to her cabin, throwing the shoes over her shoulder as she ran. From the satisfying crack and the screech of,"OUCH!", Annabeth would say they hit Drew in the face. She wasn't worried, Drew could always get a nose job (like that would help. Her skin looked like plastic enough already.).

Rule three: They steal from you, you steal back. And then run like Hades.

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